Neko

Keep in the Sunlight.



Anonymousasked:

I know you in real life and I can honestly say, you're one of the most beautiful people I've ever met. maybe this will sound cheesy and insincere, but it's true. you're kind and giving and your dry wit cracks me up. you're beautiful and I'm jealous of how you can wear basically a potato sac and look gorgeous. knowing you think you're fat breaks my heart because you're skinny and knowing that you're bothered by this falsity is even worse. please remember your greatness and don't question it

Keep in the Sunlight. answered:

WHO THE HECK IS THIS. You don’t even know how badly I needed to hear something like this the past few days. Thank you so much, I wish I knew who this was, but thank you nonetheless. 

Read More

Anonymousasked:

is Reid your first love?

Keep in the Sunlight. answered:

Reid is the first person I have said I love you to and meant it, first guy whose viewed the ugly cry, first guy to meet my family, first guy to be considered part of the family, first guy to walk an hour to my house to see me, the first guy to know the extent of my body issues and past depression, and the first guy to prove to me that he loves me, the first guy who doesn’t have to always say it, because I know it. So yes, he is my first love. I have never loved someone else the way I love Reid. 

Anonymousasked:

pic of you right now!

Keep in the Sunlight. answered:

I love my webcam right now cause in reality I have a crater on my face.

Omg why do I open my fucking mouth

More than anything, I value honesty. I admire a person who can tell me when I’m being a complete idiot, or that I have an eye crust, or that my laugh is horrendously high-pitched, or that I am overreacting. I need people in my life who are going to tell me those things out of love. I can’t promise I will always like to hear it, but it speaks measures about the person that you are. I don’t expect you to always understand how I’m feeling, or agree with my opinions, or find beauty in the things I find beauty in- but I do expect you to be honest. No matter what role you play in my life- whether you’re my parent, a friend, a guidance, or my partner, I have given you a piece of my heart and I am trusting you with it. And more than anything, I feel betrayed when I’m deceived by people who mean the world to me. You truly do have a piece of me that I will never get back. If you continually misuse my trust, eventually I am going to take that piece back. Why would I allow it to be in the hands of a person whose heart I treat like gold?  

So on my trip to Chicago we were given these sheets to fill out for our yearbook, where we nominate people for “Nerd” or “Most likely to become famous” or other junk like that, and one of the nominations was “Most likely to marry first” and I asked Reid who I should put down and he pointed to his sheet where he had already written my name and said, “you.” 

Read More

Anonymousasked:

whats love to you?

Keep in the Sunlight. answered:

Love is driving around having no idea where you’re going to go but you’re with each other so that’s all that matters. Always kissing each other longer when it’s time to leave. Looking at them and not seeing their flaws because you’re too focused on the person that they are. Remembering the smallest details about them that they probably don’t even remember telling you. Being excited to see not only them but their family. Getting psycho jealous for no reason at all just because you don’t want another girl breathing the same air as him. Stealing their clothes. Spending the afternoon under covers watching dumb shows. Appreciating how much of a dweeb they are. Being with someone and not wanting to be anywhere else but right there. 

There’s those weeks where life just kicks your ass. This was one of those weeks for me. It feels like nothing has really gone that way I wanted it to. I’ve been so stressed out, there feels like there’s no time for anything. I’ve had so much on my plate, I’ve been giving the minimal, half-ass version of myself to everything and everyone. It feels like this is what getting older is: having no time to do the things you really want to do and coming to the realization that everybody is a douchebag.

It’s hard enough when other people let you down, but letting yourself down and then having to live with that person every waking minute is harder. I am always the one who loves more. I am always the one to apologize just so I can feel at peace. I am always the first to justify other people’s wrong-doings towards me, so forgiving others is much easier than forgiving myself. I take every second to undermine myself it seems and it’s a result of things I’ve put myself through. Sometimes I feel it for a couple hours, other times, for a couple months. I spent years of my life thinking this way and when it creeps back in I feel like I’m breaking all over again. I feel like my mind is screaming and I am the only one who can hear it. I feel like it is so easy for me to start believing the lies I spew at myself. And I think it’s so easy for all of us to do that: to tell ourselves we’re not going to do good anyway so why try. Here’s what I have to say to that- BULL SHIT. 

It’s so much easier, so much more convenient to become a firm believer in your doubts. It so much easier to say “I am not worth the stars so I am not going to shoot for them.” That’s ridiculous. We all fail. The truth is, we always find something that tells us to keep going, keep pushing, keep giving your mind, your soul, and your heart, just when you have convinced yourself of all the reasons why not to. It is so much easier to hide away in your bedroom dwelling on your failures than to get dressed and actually brush your teeth, and be prepared for whatever the universe is going to throw at you today.

No one has your ridiculous laugh. No one has your weird freckle that you think is ugly but is actually really cute. No one has your completely pessimistic humor. No one has the same passion you do to make your mark on this earth. Your laugh, your freckle, your wit- all of those things are you and you decide how your mark is made: either with all your beautiful, gut-wrenching, hopeless fears and ambitions, or only merely parts of you. Your mark can either be half-hearted or whole. 

Read More